Disclaimer: I’m a bitter person from time to time. I’m not happy go lucky. I’m usually optimistic but have streaks of pessimism. So I wrote this as a reminder to myself as much as anything else. If you find yourself rolling your eyes at the cheesy nature of this article, then keep reading because the article is specifically for you.
So now what was I talking about…ah yes!!!
Me Me Me!
How will I succeed? How will I get ahead? How can I make millions of dollars! How can I have people erect a temple in my honor?
It’s time to be selfish. It’s time to think about yourself and your goals. How will you get that next promotion? How will you make more money?
The answer is really quite simple. Help others succeed! By being selfless and helping others achieve their goals, you stand out. You become a person with answers and the ability to get it done. Helping others achieve goals professionally and personally allow for the greatest growth possible.
People tend to get caught up in following only their own personal interests. By doing this they are committing a classic faux pas. By fixating on their own self-interest they have lost sight of the thing that actually drives people upward, namely other people. All the greatest solo artists in the world have large teams supporting their actions. The forest grows taller to reach the sun because of its competition and surroundings, not in spite of it.
But that jerk won’t ever give back to me!
By helping others, they will want to help you. What goes around comes around.
For the pessimists of the world (and I have been known to dabble in the glass half empty way of thinking from time to time) stop thinking about whether a person deserves your help or whether that person will pay it forward/back. It doesn’t matter!!! It’s not about what they owe you; it’s about propping people up. You’re only making yourself better at what you do by helping everyone you can. Even if that jerk you helped out does not give you full credit, or help you back, there’s someone who saw what you did. Heck…just consider it practice. Every win you contribute to is a win for yourself, a weapon in your arsenal, a dime in your proverbial karma bank.
But jerks always get ahead! (and black holes)
Does it seem like the jerks are always getting ahead? Do you feel that the spoiled, entitled brats of the world are running it? Well there are two things that you can do about that also. Ignore your instincts and help them too! They don’t even realize it about themselves. They haven’t read their Hesse. They haven’t gone out on their Sidharthan journey to see pain yet. Their biggest problem really is that Dad got them the red beamer when they really wanted the blue one. This is legitimately the largest disappointment of their life.
Even if you don’t like it you should swallow your dislike of these people. Most successful people get ahead through hard work, helping others, and being darn good at what they do. They are not bitter people. By fixating on what you don’t like about people, particularly those around you and/or above you, you have created a black hole (let me explain).
The black hole exists as a part of the word I haven’t heard effect. The word I haven’t heard effect is when you hear a word that is new to you. Upon learning what this word means, you start hearing it everywhere all of the sudden. You believe you’ve never heard the word before, and now it is everywhere! The same thing works for negative feelings. If you fixate on them or constantly uncover them in regards to other people, pretty soon you will see it everywhere. Then naturally this negativity will turn inwards creating a void. Before you know it …BOOM! You’re the jerk that no one likes.
If you are already spinning in this black hole, then maybe consider that you’re dislike of people comes from a bitterness about your own personal position rather than the person you dislike. In fact this is where most negativity spawns from…jealousy, envy, unhappiness with personal place.
Come back to the light side of the force.
Try and come back to the light side. Swallow your pride. Try to make a change for yourself. If you don’t know how maybe read my other article: “I Can’t Because….(The diabolical excuse machine)” https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/20141027160910-164865733-i-can-t-because-the-diabolical-excuse-machine?trk=mp-reader-card
One thing you can do right away though is help others. This circles back to the main point. You will find more satisfaction than ever before by doing this. Since ‘tis the season of giving, classic characters like Scrooge and the Grinch come to mind. These characters found true personal fulfillment by helping others. Helping others helps you!
As a true test, go and help someone.
As a bigger test, go and help someone you don’t really like.
So be greedy, be selfish , think of yourself, get ahead, GO HELP PEOPLE!
*And if you’re already at the top, don’t stop helping people. Continue to pay it back, you didn’t get there by yourself.
…..If you just want to test yourself for true karmic balance, give a donation (time or money) to something you believe in and do it anonymously. Keep it as your own selfish secret! Don’t tell a soul and just let that good feeling grow inside of you.