Site icon Matt Durante

Exude Confidence Without Arrogance

Don’t let your confidence be mistaken for arrogance.

If you are arrogant….stop it!

People are already talking about you behind your back, and not in a good way. Humility is a powerful thing. You can be a superstar without being cocky. In fact your career will thank you for it…or at least your co-workers will.

“When the sunflower is at its greatest height, it bows its head.”

Here are some tenants for being confident without being arrogant.

1. Know your stuff.

I don’t mean be comfortable with it. I mean be an expert. If you don’t have an answer, that’s okay as long as you know where to get one quickly.

2. Try to be the smartest person in the room but don’t ever presume you are.

Always learn. Always seek to improve your knowledge base. Always do your homework and keep up with your specialty. Always be working towards something new. Even an unrelated set of information has merit. Who knew that your newest client was a connoisseur or enthusiast of (insert any topic here). You’ll blow them away if you’re a renaissance man (or woman) and can chime in on their favorite thing…

It helps if you happen to have a genuine love of learning. I still find value in knowing math equations you thought you’d ‘never’ use. Remember, everything known has intrinsic value, and while you can’t possibly know everything, you should try.

Actually….know a few things at an expert level, and then attempt to learn everything else.

For the second part, people always seem to spread this myth of never doubt yourself….and I think this is wrong. One should always have a decent sense of self-doubt, because everything you thought was correct in a given situation can be made at once irrelevant with new information. I’m not saying you should worry about being wrong, I’m just saying be open to the idea that you could be wrong.

3. Don’t judge a book by its cover.

Your preconceived notions of people will eliminate untapped resources and possibly more.
Anyone, and I mean anyone, could hold the answer to your next problem. The old cliché, “minds are like parachutes, they only work when they are open.”

4. Use your words, know what you mean to say, speak with assurance. Be charismatic if you can.

Be honest, be knowledgeable, and be confident. Make eye contact, have a firm handshake. Have a plan. Be willing to smile. Don’t take yourself too seriously… you may find you are quite charming.

5. Use your ears way more than you use your mouth. By observing all of the small details and listening well you can help yourself, and ultimately your client. “Sherlock Holmes” it.

Actively listening rather than waiting for your turn to talk can make your career infinitely more purposeful, and you infinitely more effective.

6. Never reveal your full hand.

It’s okay to not drop the whole master plan at one time. Some things need to be held until the right moment. The build-up and anticipation makes the finishing touch that much better.

7. Play chess, not checkers. While being bold is good, it is always better to be 6 moves ahead instead of blindly leaping. Have a backup plan for your backup plan (or an exit strategy).

Sometimes you may have no choice but to leap into the unknown, but most of the time, you can mitigate risks and appear more prepared if you have thoroughly planned for your what ifs.

8. Stay cool always…never let them see you bleed.

Amidst frustration, cooler heads prevail. Nothing makes you look better than performing top notch under pressure or criticism …this is how people become legends.

9. Hold on to your core values, but don’t be too close minded or judgmental of others beliefs.

This is very similar to don’t judge a book by its cover but really quite different. It simply means be honest with yourself, have a solid character anchor to hold onto, but also understand that not everyone has the same beliefs as you. Understand it and be okay with it. You know who you are, let people be who they are.

10. If you fail, take the value in the experience and add it to your collection. Success is forged from many attempts.

This is very straightforward. If you plan to succeed, be prepared to hit speed bumps. Luck is a very fickle beast, so don’t depend on it.

 

(Originally Published on LinkedIn Pulse)

Exit mobile version